We're Building This Castle
My present apartment was fine for me alone that first year, when I was looking for a wife. The location was perfect, right on the Volga River, at the center of the transportation net, near the parks, stores, cafes, theaters, concert halls, saunas, pool halls, gambling casinos, libraries, topless joints, museums, universities, and everything that makes Tver a very nice city. The rent wasn't bad, $130 a month (furnished) including heat, water, lights, and telephone. For some photos of Tver, check out my City Tver image gallery. But with a beautiful wife, a pretty daughter, and a dog that wins beauty contests, it was sort of crowded. We spent a year debating what we wanted to do. A luxury apartment? A fine house? The usual Russian apartment and dacha (country house) combination? I eventually noticed that building costs here are very low. Plumbers work for around a dollar an hour, and if you buy locally made products, they too are inexpensive. Bricks made in the local factory sell for three cents each. But you have to buy white ones. Red Bricks, made in St.Petersburg, cost three times as much. I did some back of the envelope computing and convinced myself that I could build the castle of my dreams, cheap! There turned out to be some catches. In America, if somebody owns some empty land free and clear, and you are paying cash, the deal can be filed and completed in twenty minutes. In Russia, the bureaucracy is even worse than that in the US. Hard to believe, I know. Things can happen fast in America. When a friend of mine in California ordered a house a while ago, he was guaranteed completion in eight weeks. Our construction started 16 months ago, and it likely won't be done for another year. Then again, Rodger isn't getting masonry walls three feet thick! And mostly, you can get a mortgage in the US. Rodger put $500 down and signed the deal. Mortgages seem to be illegal in Russia. You want it, you pay cash. So since I couldn't mortgage the castle, I had to mortgage myself. I promised to write five more books for Mr. Baen.
We still don't have the roof on, and then there are still the windows, doors, the interiors, the draw bridge, the mote, the outer walls, the gardens, the peacocks and the unicorns, and dozens of other necessary things. We are pressing forth earnestly, and some day, some day, even the wine cellar will be filled. The armored knights should be easy enough. I'll just set up a local version of the SCA. And Tver is filthy with lovely maidens who can easily be put in distress. The place will have three main bedrooms, five guest rooms, and six cubbyholes up in the garret. Plus the servant's quarters, of course.